Tuesday, January 25, 2011

29 Gifts ~ Days 17, 18, & 19 ~ The Gift of Service

Sometimes gifts are bittersweet and this is how I feel about this one, well actually they are three. My daughter, who has been staying with us for a month after a break-up moved into a new apartment over the weekend. I had imagined something different, but there we were and she had made a decision I wasn't happy with. In fact, I was angry, hurt, and disappointed. There were a few ways I could have handled it and I chose to take the hurt, the anger, and the disappointment and turn it into a gift.

While she was at work I went to Office Max, purchased boxes, and then came home and began the processing of packing up her things. In just a little over a month, she had moved half of her apartment into my kitchen and my guest bedroom and bath and she hadn't stayed long enough to really even settle in, but long enough for there to be a lot of stuff :-). As I filled each box, I labeled the side and the top with the room where it would go, the contents, and whether it was fragile. I drew simple little pictures of her valentine box, something I knew would touch her. I placed them all near the front door so they would not have to be carried very far. (Moving can be exhausting :-) and even though I wasn't happy with her decision, and I wasn't going to support what I felt was a mistake, I could at least do this.

For Day 17's gift I packed up the contents of her kitchen (10 boxes) and on Day 18 I packed her bedroom and craft area (another 10 boxes) There were items I wasn't sure what to do with, so I just assembled several more boxes and put them on the bed. We have some relationship work to do, yes we do :-), but this gift was done with love and that is a step in the right direction.

Friday evening was date night so Rick and I were out and when we returned home she had left a note thanking us for allowing her to stay and for packing the boxes, expressing disappointment at the outcome, and confidence in her decision...as well as noting her new address.
This will be her new address card design

On Saturday, I was having a really hard time when she and her ex came to pack up the moving van. I could talk with her, but because of the tension that had been between us, I could not offer to help. Fortunately, my husband stepped in and asked her what the plan was. He cleared the wedge between us and I soon found myself offering my Day 19 gift, helping her move the boxes from the house into the van and into her car. Her dad was going to help her on the other end. When it was all done, she hugged me, told me thank you again, and that we would work on it. We both cried...and told each other "I love you."
Brandi and I during one of our adventures :-)
 Today I am grateful for:

1) A mother's unconditional love
2) An independent and fearless daughter
3) My supportive hubs :-)


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  2. WOW, you have been going thru a lot with Brandi. My heart goes out to you and whisper prayers up for both of you.