Saturday, September 18, 2010

You deserve a break today!

What are you doing for fun this weekend? I love my work so I'm always thinking about it. Well, except when I'm hiking, or canoeing, or zip lining, or painting, writing, telling jokes, dancing, singing or reading...you get the drift. It wasn't always like that though. Years ago, I was a workaholic accountant working for a bank. I thought I was a great mom too, because I would often take Brandi to work with me on a Saturday. I'd let her feed the ducks in the moat that surrounded an upscale lounge on the office property. She loved playing in the supply closet where all the great markers and office goodies were. I allowed eight years to pass us by like that.

Sometimes it takes a devastating loss to jolt a person back to realty. In my case, it was like an avalanche of losses. In 1998, my marriage fell apart, I pushed my friends away, our business was failing, we lost our home, and the most devastating of all, my thirty seven year old baby sister died. She had been my rock, and now, she was gone. I could barely put one foot in front of the other without thinking about it and I was in and out of a catatonic state for months. My identity had been shaken to the very core.

I remember writing her eulogy on the plane to Louisiana where mom and I had to fly to claim her body. Poignant memories flooded my mind and poured out onto the paper.  Recalling all the ways she displayed her beautiful nature. She was so well balanced and I so loved that about her. Barb worked hard all week, and then on the weekend, she and the girls were at the beach, or camping, or exploring the zoo, parks, or gardens. She knew how to have fun and that made her a joy to spend time with. Time that I would never get with her again.

About a year later, the fog of grief began to lift and I was starting to pull my life back together again. I poured myself into a master gardener class and made new friends. I took ballroom dance lessons and golf lessons. I took every opportunity to visit my nieces or bring them here to visit. I went back to school and made friends there. I began to see the world a little more like Barb had and I became acutely aware of how time and life can pass by and before you know it, a decade has elapsed.

More than a decade has passed since Barb died, twelve years to be exact and my life is completely different. While I still take care of business, there is always time in my schedule for fun. If a friend calls for lunch or coffee, I'm there. If my brother calls and wants to talk for four hours on the phone, I'm there. If hubby wants to go shooting, or play golf, or jump a hundred feet out of a tree and zip 1400 feet across a river...I'm there.

Tree Top Soaring ~ Colorado

We work hard all week, we pay our bills, and take care of business, and life is about more than that. It's great if you have a career that doesn't feel like work and I am blessed to have that, but for many of us, work is a means to an end and we deserve to reward ourselves for doing it. So what are you doing for fun this weekend?

1 comment:

  1. I just love this post. I'm working on it and it's a process... I find that with the kids we all get going in our own directions on the weekends and its harder to schedule family time now that they are older. Unless of course we are going on vacation! I'm going to take your words to heart and schedule something really fun for us this next weekend! How's that for planning ahead?!

    ReplyDelete